Dear Recruiter, I found a vacancy you posted. I ticked all the required boxes. I sat down and drafted a cover letter for you (it took me 30 minutes - has to be perfect!), then I rechecked my CV. Mmm, wondering if I should send you the condensed version, but scared there might be something in the full version which you pick up that will match me perfectly to your vacancy. So, I decided on the short version, I weighed up my chances between your short attention span (I think recruiters call it being busy), and the chances of you actually reading my full version CV to find something specific in there.
I drafted the email, being professional but very polite. You see, I think recruiters have an arrogance which you need to bow to, politely I will add. Re-read the email. I said a little prayer and pressed the send button.
I did not get an automated answer that my application has been received which is ok. I know by now they are merely automated and means nothing really. The wait begins. I dream of this vacancy, I can see myself at this job. They say you should manifest but it is a bit difficult as I do not know who the client is. (Recruiters work in secrecy, maybe it is actually the mafia, who knows?) So I cannot walk the property to manifest or do some research. It is a shot in the dark.
Dear Recruiter, it has been 3 weeks and I have not heard anything from you, I wonder if I should send you an email to ask? I am actually a bit reluctant, I do not want to annoy you and miss the opportunity. So I wait 2 more weeks. I guess my application was not good enough, really hope you did receive it though!
So I apply for 3 more vacancies. And the same scenario plays out again. I apply for 5 more, I guess the more you apply, the better your chances. Now, this has become a full-time job, searching vacancies, doing the application, remember a nice cover letter and a very polite email. Still nothing.
After 3 months and over 30 applications, I give up, decide to ditch that perfect cover letter and just submit, the more the better I assume!
Dear Recruiter, do you understand that your vacancy has given me hope? Do you understand that I have entrusted to you my most personal details? Without acknowledgement, without letting me know that I cannot be considered to take up your valuable time for an interview.
Dear Recruiter, last thing I want to say, do you understand that you work with people and not a commodity? You only contact the ones you can "use", right? There is no connection, there is no humility, and there is no empathy for personal situations.